Today was the second day of piano camp, and I'm pretty crazy busy so I probably won't post for the rest of this week. Here's an old poem, from January 2009 that I really like.
Silence sits
high on the wall
and waits for night to fall
Noise he suffers
as he waits
and watches shadows crawl.
From corners first
they spill to floors
and slowly creep along
Colors change
and sounds die down
as silence sings it's song.
A sticky web
that coats the mind
and seems to make all shrink
Silence spreads
and takes control
he moves so fast-- don't blink.
Before they know
or comprehend
that there is no more light
Darkness breathes
and silence sighs
they merge and form the night.
Kelia
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Nano excerpt #10
The end of chapter two! Also, I know yesterday was the summer solstice, but happy summer!
That night I couldn’t sleep, my head was going in circles. I was restless too, first I’d be too hot and as soon as I shifted I’d get in an uncomfortable position and then I’d have an itch. I tried not to watch the clock ticking the night away.
And then I started to hear something-- a bird singing, or maybe just my blood rushing, or a song… I felt an actual pain in my chest as the noise drifted into something almost recognizable. It was still too far away to make out-- no, I corrected myself. The sound wasn’t getting closer. It was just the band starting up. I hadn’t heard them for years. I had a vague memory of weird dreams that music caused though, and it was getting loud enough to make my head spin and my heart thump-- so I reached over and grabbed the ear plugs on my desk. The night was finally silent, and I sighed and went to sleep.
Kelia
That night I couldn’t sleep, my head was going in circles. I was restless too, first I’d be too hot and as soon as I shifted I’d get in an uncomfortable position and then I’d have an itch. I tried not to watch the clock ticking the night away.
And then I started to hear something-- a bird singing, or maybe just my blood rushing, or a song… I felt an actual pain in my chest as the noise drifted into something almost recognizable. It was still too far away to make out-- no, I corrected myself. The sound wasn’t getting closer. It was just the band starting up. I hadn’t heard them for years. I had a vague memory of weird dreams that music caused though, and it was getting loud enough to make my head spin and my heart thump-- so I reached over and grabbed the ear plugs on my desk. The night was finally silent, and I sighed and went to sleep.
Kelia
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Nano excerpt #9
This is a new section, which I don't know if I really need. I like it fine but it doesn't really do anything :/
“We’re home!” Jake announced, banging the door shut to really let us know. He had just picked up mom from work, and I headed towards the kitchen and the cake. “I am staying out here until you light it,” he informed us from the hall and Elle grinned at me with the lighter in hand. Mom was standing in the door way still in her nurse’s scrubs, smiling at us.
“Hi mom,” I said and went over for a peck on the cheek.
“Hi,” she said, smoothing my hair back into place. “The cake looks beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I said, looking back as Elle lit the candles. It glistened, the dark chocolate covered in home made caramel sauce and studded all over with chocolate chips. It really had turned out well.
“Hurry,” Jake begged us and I rolled my eyes.
“He’s been looking forward to this all month,” mom said in her quiet, amused voice. “Or all year if you believe him.”
“Done!” Elle announced and I flicked the lights off. The glowing candles were in a formation to make a twenty one, and they only lit up the curve of Elle’s chin and her long fingers. The rest of the room seemed pitch black compared to the sparks of flame and the one patch of gleaming moon light behind Elle.
“Happy Birthday to you,” mom started singing, and I joined in enthusiastically off key. Jake appeared, wincing at either the sound or the darkness, and Elle moved back from the candles so he could sit at the table. “Happy birthday to you!” we finished, Elle almost giggling.
“We should record that sometime, it’s quite special,” she whispered to me and Jake shushed her. He thought for a long time, his face turned away from us from where he sat, and finally blew all the candles out with a huge gust of breath. We clapped and mom turned the lights back on, and the room transformed back into the one I knew. I could see mom’s expression now, she was smiling at the back of Jake’s head and looked tired like usual. Jake twisted around to grin at us and Elle grabbed the knife to cut up the cake.
“You know how to do it Elle?” Mom asked, though Elle had already started.
“Yes mom,” she said. “And besides, no piece is too big right?” mom laughed at that, a sound which I always thought made her seem younger.
“You’re right,” she agreed. “Give the biggest one to Jake.”
“That sounds good,” he said and soon we were all eating away. It was delicious, rich and sticky and the chocolate chips provided the perfect bit of crunch along with it. We all sat around the table, for the first time since Christmas and I couldn’t help but look at our reflections in the window. You could barely see the moon light on the floor any more, our bright artificial light was pushing it outside. We took up the whole window, all I could see in it was laughter and faces eating and the perfect family of four.
“We’re home!” Jake announced, banging the door shut to really let us know. He had just picked up mom from work, and I headed towards the kitchen and the cake. “I am staying out here until you light it,” he informed us from the hall and Elle grinned at me with the lighter in hand. Mom was standing in the door way still in her nurse’s scrubs, smiling at us.
“Hi mom,” I said and went over for a peck on the cheek.
“Hi,” she said, smoothing my hair back into place. “The cake looks beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I said, looking back as Elle lit the candles. It glistened, the dark chocolate covered in home made caramel sauce and studded all over with chocolate chips. It really had turned out well.
“Hurry,” Jake begged us and I rolled my eyes.
“He’s been looking forward to this all month,” mom said in her quiet, amused voice. “Or all year if you believe him.”
“Done!” Elle announced and I flicked the lights off. The glowing candles were in a formation to make a twenty one, and they only lit up the curve of Elle’s chin and her long fingers. The rest of the room seemed pitch black compared to the sparks of flame and the one patch of gleaming moon light behind Elle.
“Happy Birthday to you,” mom started singing, and I joined in enthusiastically off key. Jake appeared, wincing at either the sound or the darkness, and Elle moved back from the candles so he could sit at the table. “Happy birthday to you!” we finished, Elle almost giggling.
“We should record that sometime, it’s quite special,” she whispered to me and Jake shushed her. He thought for a long time, his face turned away from us from where he sat, and finally blew all the candles out with a huge gust of breath. We clapped and mom turned the lights back on, and the room transformed back into the one I knew. I could see mom’s expression now, she was smiling at the back of Jake’s head and looked tired like usual. Jake twisted around to grin at us and Elle grabbed the knife to cut up the cake.
“You know how to do it Elle?” Mom asked, though Elle had already started.
“Yes mom,” she said. “And besides, no piece is too big right?” mom laughed at that, a sound which I always thought made her seem younger.
“You’re right,” she agreed. “Give the biggest one to Jake.”
“That sounds good,” he said and soon we were all eating away. It was delicious, rich and sticky and the chocolate chips provided the perfect bit of crunch along with it. We all sat around the table, for the first time since Christmas and I couldn’t help but look at our reflections in the window. You could barely see the moon light on the floor any more, our bright artificial light was pushing it outside. We took up the whole window, all I could see in it was laughter and faces eating and the perfect family of four.
Kelia
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
50th Post! Nano Excerpt #8
I can't believe it's my 50th post already! Pretty crazy.
“Don’t go in the kitchen!” I warned, and stepped inside.
Something was different. I paused, one foot still on the porch, and took a breath. The cake smell was gone, replaced by the aroma of old leaves. With all the greenness and the warm wind, that was the last thing I expected. It smelled like fall.
“Move,” Elle said behind me, her arms full of pillows and bags, and she shouldered her way past me before I could think.
“I won’t, don’t worry,” Jake said in answer to my warning and followed Elle inside, leaving me still in the doorway. Was the smell of fall so weird? I wondered. I shivered slightly and stepped the rest of the way inside, shutting the door and looking around. Everything was exactly the same, the family picture of us from ten years ago, a painting Elle had given mom last year, a photo of the three of us being goofy last summer. I could hear Jake and Elle talking from her room, their voices loud and reassuring as I followed the smell past the kitchen and into mom’s room.
Maybe she’d been home, I thought, and gotten some fertilizer out for the garden. That was probably it. But that didn’t explain the leaf sitting on her dresser, a large silver leaf with golden veins. It almost looked like metal but it was soft, I picked it up and it felt like a feather. And it smelled like fall.
“Hey,” Jake said from the doorway, poking his head in. “What’re you doing?”
“Nothing,” I said with a frown, looking down at the leaf “Have you ever seen anything like this?”
“No,” he said, his eyes flicking down and back up. “Where’d you get it?”
“I found it, here,” I said, and he slowly leaned against the door frame.
“Mom must have found it,” he said with a shrug, and I nodded. There was no reason for me to think that it hadn’t been there before I’d gone to get Jake, no reason other than the smell. “Aren’t you going to make my cake?” he asked, cracking a smile, and I nodded. “Cannot wait!” he said, high fiving the door frame as he turned to go and already whistling. I put the leaf down and left the room, closing the door behind me.
Kelia
“Don’t go in the kitchen!” I warned, and stepped inside.
Something was different. I paused, one foot still on the porch, and took a breath. The cake smell was gone, replaced by the aroma of old leaves. With all the greenness and the warm wind, that was the last thing I expected. It smelled like fall.
“Move,” Elle said behind me, her arms full of pillows and bags, and she shouldered her way past me before I could think.
“I won’t, don’t worry,” Jake said in answer to my warning and followed Elle inside, leaving me still in the doorway. Was the smell of fall so weird? I wondered. I shivered slightly and stepped the rest of the way inside, shutting the door and looking around. Everything was exactly the same, the family picture of us from ten years ago, a painting Elle had given mom last year, a photo of the three of us being goofy last summer. I could hear Jake and Elle talking from her room, their voices loud and reassuring as I followed the smell past the kitchen and into mom’s room.
Maybe she’d been home, I thought, and gotten some fertilizer out for the garden. That was probably it. But that didn’t explain the leaf sitting on her dresser, a large silver leaf with golden veins. It almost looked like metal but it was soft, I picked it up and it felt like a feather. And it smelled like fall.
“Hey,” Jake said from the doorway, poking his head in. “What’re you doing?”
“Nothing,” I said with a frown, looking down at the leaf “Have you ever seen anything like this?”
“No,” he said, his eyes flicking down and back up. “Where’d you get it?”
“I found it, here,” I said, and he slowly leaned against the door frame.
“Mom must have found it,” he said with a shrug, and I nodded. There was no reason for me to think that it hadn’t been there before I’d gone to get Jake, no reason other than the smell. “Aren’t you going to make my cake?” he asked, cracking a smile, and I nodded. “Cannot wait!” he said, high fiving the door frame as he turned to go and already whistling. I put the leaf down and left the room, closing the door behind me.
Kelia
Monday, June 18, 2012
Nano excerpt #7
“How are you?” he asked both of us, smiling at Elle’s pajamas. “I feel like we haven’t talked since Christmas! How come neither of you talk to me when I’m at school?”
“You never talk to us,” Elle said bluntly, which made me laugh and him shake his head furiously.
“No, it’s not like that,” he insisted. “I’m just really busy.” He sighed at our identical expressions of skepticism and shrugged, rubbing the sleepiness away from his face. “I have the worst hangover,” he muttered, which made Elle jab him with her elbow. “Hey it’s legal!” he told her. “We waited until midnight.”
“That’s right!” she ohhed. “So. Weird. You’re an adult!”She grabbed some of his stuff and they followed me to the car, chattering the whole way. Jake had to fill us in on everything that had happened since Christmas. His girlfriend of last semester dumped him, he told us with a shrug. But he had found a new girl, a lovely girl, who liked to play guitar…
My thoughts were not entirely there as I drove home. Jake and Elle were laughing and talking and I was focused on the road, making a comment or smiling every so often. Jake was half turned around in his seat so he could look at both Elle and me, and his hands flew everywhere as he told story after story. He had had quite the night- or early morning rather, and there were not words to describe how hyper on exhaustion he was now. I felt stupid, sitting there not saying anything, but Elle was filling in the necessary ‘Oh!’s and ‘What happened next?’ and I didn’t know what else to do. Finally the drive was over and I jumped out of the car.
“You okay, Vee?” Jake asked, hurrying after me and catching my elbow before I could go inside.
“Yeah,” I said, but he still stood there looking at me expectantly. “I’m fine,” I elaborated. “Just tired. I hope I’m not catching Elle’s cold.”
“Ugh, that would not be good,” he said, his face clearing. “I have to get my stuff so I’ll meet you inside k?”
Kelia
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Nano Excerpt #6
The first buildings of the town started popping up around us, we had come through all the hilly forest roads without my really noticing them and now we were beginning to see signs of habitation. “I’m so excited,” Elle bounced, realizing how close we were. “Is it three yet? It’s past! He’ll be here already.” I smiled silently.
Elle was somehow completely herself around Jake, though I had never actually seen her in a situation where she wasn’t completely herself. And I-- I didn’t know how to be around him. I felt like the older one when I was with Elle, the mature and responsible sister who could still laugh and be silly. Around Jake I felt about eight years old, him looking down on me even if he didn’t mean to. He was just really tall.
“There he is!” Elle exclaimed as I turned into the library parking lot. Jake was laying on the stone lion, of course. The lion had spectacles and was reading a fat tome, and my brother had always climbed on it as far back as I could remember. The librarians had stopped telling him to get off because he would just be back on the next minute they looked away. Today he was sunbathing, face turned up to the clear sky with his head resting on the lion’s. He almost looked asleep, and didn’t move at the sound of our car doors. The sun was making his hair practically shine, and the sudden thought that he looked like dad made me falter. Elle was already out of the car and sprinting towards him, he heard the sound of her coming and turned his head.
“Hey,” he said, smiling and sitting up.
“Happy Birthday!” She exclaimed and he caught her in a hug.
“Happy Birthday,” I echoed, walking across the lawn towards them.
“Vee!” he said, standing up when Elle let him go and folding me into a barrel hug. His arms completely encased me it felt like, and he almost lifted me off my feet. I made a noise of protest and he laughed, putting me back down.
Kelia
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Nano excerpt #5
I actually did some rewriting today, wohoo! First is the rewritten version, and then the original, with notes in red. If anyone's confused, tomorrow is the anniversary of their dad's death.
Elle followed me and sighed into the may air, it had gotten warmer while she was asleep. I quickly rolled the windows of the car down, letting the wind sweep out the car's constant smell of just having been vacuumed.
"When I get a car," Elle told me, propping her feet up on the immaculately clean dashboard, "It's going to be messy."
"Of course," I agreed. I could imagine it perfectly-- paint splotches on the seats, clothes she'd forgotten about discarded in the backseat, and paint brushes lodged in every spare space.
"Your dream car?" she asked me, and I smiled.
"Purple."
The streets rolled by in silence, Elle with her faced turned towards the wind and me staring unseeingly ahead. I wondered what she was thinking about; art, or Jake's birthday, or tomorrow's anniversary, or the cake-- and she looked at me and bit her lip like she always did when she was about to ask something.
"Are you nervous for tomorrow?" I blurted before she could say anything.
"Erm," she said non-commitedly, playing with her bracelet. "Not nervous, no. There's no reason to be, right?"
"No," I sighed, her logic making me slightly irritated. "It'll be just like every year." That was not a comforting thought, true as it was.
"I don't want to think about it today though," she said, leaning forward to turn the radio on. I didn't get how she could put it out of her mind so easily, but I fought with her about what station to listen to and tried to forget as much as I could.
Elle grabbed a sweatshirt and followed me, and sighed when the warm may air hit her face.
“When did it get to be so lovely out?” she murmured.
“While you were sleeping,” I told her, and got in the car. It was immaculately clean, everything in it’s proper place like mom would want it and I made a face. It always smelled like it had just been vacuumed.
“When I get a car,” Elle said, hopping inside and following where I was looking, “It’s going to be messy.”
“Of course,” I agreed, I could see it now. There would be paint splotches everywhere on the seats and paint brushes lodged underneath them and clothes she’d discarded and forgotten everywhere. Just like her room.
“When I get a car,” I told her, pulling out of the driveway and down the street, “It’s going to be purple.” That was all I wanted. We both fell into silence, staring into our futures and our dream cars, and Elle yawned. This seems a bit random/ “look at me I’m telling you about the characters!”-ish.
“Are you nervous at all?” she asked me abruptly, without turning her head.
“For what?” I asked, though I knew. She blinked, irritated, and I said softly “Yes. If I think about it, which I’m not going to.” I don’t know how she did it, going one second from the silliest of things to the most serious. To switch over so abruptly left me reeling, even though I hadn’t completely stopped thinking about it since I’d remembered. Maybe that meant she had been half thinking about it too. “Are you?” I asked for something to say, glancing over. She shrugged and looked down, playing with her bracelet. “Hey, you can’t just shrug,” I insisted. “You brought it up.”
“Never mind,” she said. “Forget it. It’s not like there’s a point in talking about it right?”
“It’ll just be like every year,” I said, though that was not a comforting thought. She nodded and turned on the radio, a sure way to distract us both.
“Oh God,” I said at the same time that she yelped “I love this song!” She grinned at me and I sighed, shrinking slightly in my seat.
“Turn it off,” I begged her, fighting the urge to cover my ears. I had to keep looking at the road even though I wanted to run out of the car. She was laughing and I persisted, “Turn it off! I’m allergic to love songs!”
“That’s nothing new,” she remarked, but sighed and finally turned it to a different channel. I straightened up immediately and sighed with satisfaction.
“Thank you,” I told her politely and she snorted. This new song was about lovers fighting, which wasn’t wonderful either but it was better at least than someone crooning their adoration to the world. Same thing here :/
And then I was thinking that I might just cut this section entirely, since I don't want to play up the anniversary too much. We'll see, at least I can move past this part now!
Kelia
Elle followed me and sighed into the may air, it had gotten warmer while she was asleep. I quickly rolled the windows of the car down, letting the wind sweep out the car's constant smell of just having been vacuumed.
"When I get a car," Elle told me, propping her feet up on the immaculately clean dashboard, "It's going to be messy."
"Of course," I agreed. I could imagine it perfectly-- paint splotches on the seats, clothes she'd forgotten about discarded in the backseat, and paint brushes lodged in every spare space.
"Your dream car?" she asked me, and I smiled.
"Purple."
The streets rolled by in silence, Elle with her faced turned towards the wind and me staring unseeingly ahead. I wondered what she was thinking about; art, or Jake's birthday, or tomorrow's anniversary, or the cake-- and she looked at me and bit her lip like she always did when she was about to ask something.
"Are you nervous for tomorrow?" I blurted before she could say anything.
"Erm," she said non-commitedly, playing with her bracelet. "Not nervous, no. There's no reason to be, right?"
"No," I sighed, her logic making me slightly irritated. "It'll be just like every year." That was not a comforting thought, true as it was.
"I don't want to think about it today though," she said, leaning forward to turn the radio on. I didn't get how she could put it out of her mind so easily, but I fought with her about what station to listen to and tried to forget as much as I could.
Elle grabbed a sweatshirt and followed me, and sighed when the warm may air hit her face.
“When did it get to be so lovely out?” she murmured.
“While you were sleeping,” I told her, and got in the car. It was immaculately clean, everything in it’s proper place like mom would want it and I made a face. It always smelled like it had just been vacuumed.
“When I get a car,” Elle said, hopping inside and following where I was looking, “It’s going to be messy.”
“Of course,” I agreed, I could see it now. There would be paint splotches everywhere on the seats and paint brushes lodged underneath them and clothes she’d discarded and forgotten everywhere. Just like her room.
“When I get a car,” I told her, pulling out of the driveway and down the street, “It’s going to be purple.” That was all I wanted. We both fell into silence, staring into our futures and our dream cars, and Elle yawned. This seems a bit random/ “look at me I’m telling you about the characters!”-ish.
“Are you nervous at all?” she asked me abruptly, without turning her head.
“For what?” I asked, though I knew. She blinked, irritated, and I said softly “Yes. If I think about it, which I’m not going to.” I don’t know how she did it, going one second from the silliest of things to the most serious. To switch over so abruptly left me reeling, even though I hadn’t completely stopped thinking about it since I’d remembered. Maybe that meant she had been half thinking about it too. “Are you?” I asked for something to say, glancing over. She shrugged and looked down, playing with her bracelet. “Hey, you can’t just shrug,” I insisted. “You brought it up.”
“Never mind,” she said. “Forget it. It’s not like there’s a point in talking about it right?”
“It’ll just be like every year,” I said, though that was not a comforting thought. She nodded and turned on the radio, a sure way to distract us both.
“Oh God,” I said at the same time that she yelped “I love this song!” She grinned at me and I sighed, shrinking slightly in my seat.
“Turn it off,” I begged her, fighting the urge to cover my ears. I had to keep looking at the road even though I wanted to run out of the car. She was laughing and I persisted, “Turn it off! I’m allergic to love songs!”
“That’s nothing new,” she remarked, but sighed and finally turned it to a different channel. I straightened up immediately and sighed with satisfaction.
“Thank you,” I told her politely and she snorted. This new song was about lovers fighting, which wasn’t wonderful either but it was better at least than someone crooning their adoration to the world. Same thing here :/
And then I was thinking that I might just cut this section entirely, since I don't want to play up the anniversary too much. We'll see, at least I can move past this part now!
Kelia
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